Tuesday, February 28, 2012

"I sound like a record player"...and other things your mom says

Last night I blew my stack.  I just- wigged out.  I couldn't hold it in any longer.  Yanno, I make dinner, I get on the treadmill for my hourly love fest with exercise....ugh and now it's 8:00 pm.  I yell to my 5 year old that it's time for bed, and jump in the shower.  Get out of the shower and she's still up, and I tell her again it's time for bed, it's past 8 O'clock, you're late for bed.  Go up stairs to get my jammies on and find ALL the crap I picked up earlier and put on the step (of the kids').  They ALL step over their crap to get up the stairs, instead of picking up their crap.

At this point my last nerve has broken and my blood begins the slow simmer leading up to the explosion.  You're just lucky enough that I don't feel like typing out the 4 hours prior that lead to the point, like a a horseradish bottle that fell out of the frigde and shattered on the tile, cracking it and send teeny tiny pieces of glass everywhere as I am making homemade meatballs for dinner.  The homework hour which always includes at least one screaming child.  It's just the daily routine around here, when you have a family of five (or more) chaos and noise is ever-present.

As I am getting dressed, some one needs ME.  Why me, when their father is sitting in the lazy chair on the laptop stalking the bank account, I have no idea?  But one by one they all knock on the door in true Sheldon fashion "knock knock knock MOM, knock knock knock MOM, knock knock knock MOM, knock knock knock MOM" for various reasons that include but are not limited to, "Jake called me a moron!!", "where's my footie pajamas!!",  "Megan HIIITTTTT MEEEEE!!!" and the ever popular "Hey MOM, LOOK AT WHAT I CAN DO!!".  All the while Roxy, our dog, who can't talk but whines and whines-needs to go out.

The explosion hits, and I start spewing reasons they need to be in bed instead of up, it's now 8:30.  Just so I don't disappoint myself, I verbally regurgitate the day and what they DIDN'T do that I asked them to, how no one put their clothes away and "I don't do laundry for FUN", etc.

When everyone is in bed and I walk downstairs, my loving husband just looks at me and shake's his head like "damn kids",and gets up to take a shower-as if he is just as frustrated as me.

Why oh why, when children or pets need something...anything, they immediately come to me.  My children will seek me out to ask me to get them a drink, while their dad is standing in front of the refrigerator.  It's a frustrating reality that hasn't changed for 12 years in this house.

I'm good this morning, but dang.

Today is already a better day, tonight will be a better night!


Thursday, February 23, 2012

"I love your blog" and I LOVE YOU!!

I hear this from a few people here and there.  I hardly get any comments on my blog, so usually I feel like it's just me, singing in the shower...alone.  I'm so glad I actually have a few people reading now and again.

"testing testes testing (yeah I said testes on purpose-just making sure you're paying attention) ...is this thing on?" I'll start out today with a few jokes:

What's green and has wheels?

give up?  Grass...I was just kidding about the wheels

What's Red and smells like blue paint?

RED PAINT (thanks Diane)

Okay on to the important stuff.  What's more important than laughing you say?  Good question!  Not much, except maybe GOOD NUTRITION.  I know I know, you're sick of hearing about it already, but the reason I keep harping about this is because I LOVE YOU, and I CARE ABOUT YOUR HEALTH!!

I've been juicing a meal or snack once a day for about 10 days.  My juicer is old (like 18 years old). My mother in law gave it to me 13 years or so ago, cause she bought a new one (great story about my mother in law-I'll tell you later). In the last 10 days I think my family (I know my neighbor Diane wants to stick a sock in my mouth) is looking for the OFF/MUTE button for Ms. Sparky-pants.  I have been running, walking, working out to Turbo Fire.  I am NON-FREAKING-STOP.  Not to mention my skin feels really nice!  I'm not hungry, I know you'll ask that.  I don't drink soda, I rarely drink coffee (like MAYBE once a week) I don't take any caffeine supplements.  It's just water and my daily vitamins (and whisky and water as a night cap now and then).

So how do you do this "JUICING" anyway, Jeni?  I am so glad you asked!

First I buy my veggies (this can be super expensive-especially root veggies-'cause I like to get organic)
my juice is usually carrot, beets, kale, spinach, ginger, and celery)

I cut these veggies up into pieces that fit into the little tiny juicer hole.  Here's my old-ass juicer, by the way: 

I keep all the veggies in the fridge so they are nice and cold.  When I'm done I get a nice rainbow of frothy nectar that looks like what my friend Kelly described as "melted sherbet"

The carrots make it sweet and the ginger gives it bite.  It's delicious!  and the benefits from drinking it would FAR outweigh the taste!

When I'm done I have the pleasure of cleaning the fiber or "meat" out of the juicer that I promptly throw in my compost:

Thea, my mother in law, turned me onto juicing years ago...here's why-she knows a thing or two about good health.

My mother in law is in her late 60's and back in the mid 70's developed stage 3 (out of 4) malenoma.  Malenoma is a type of skin cancer.  She had a mole removed from her leg that left a gaping reminder to her everyday.  So in 1970-something she got the news, had the surgery and back then chemotherapy wasn't an option.  So the Dr.'s gave her 6 months to a year to live.  So what did she do?  I'll tell you what she didn't do.  She didn't curl up into a ball of self pity and wallow...OH NO!  She bought a juicer and started juicing in addition to going vegetarian.  She juiced so much, her extremities turned orange from all the beta carotene in the carrots!  She juiced twice a day for two years.

My mother in law celebrated her 69th birthday in January 5th.  She is as healthy (and ornery) as a horse!  She's never had cancer again.

So raise your glass of fresh vegetable juice and drink up!


Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Challenge? How are you doing?

Did you decide to drink more water?  Eat cleaner?  What are you STILL doing today that you started doing last Thursday?  

How do you feel?

Is it working?

Will you continue to do this one healthier thing?

Talk to me. 

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Are you up for a challenge?

I've been Facebooking and tweeting the last month or so the importance of good nutrition.  Everyone knows that good nutrition is key to good health.  You hear it on the news, in reports, the facts are the facts are the facts.  Period, right?

So why don't we eat healthier?  Well that's an easy answer, cause crappy food tastes better, makes us feel cozy when we eat it, and makes us feel like we are comforted.  

What if I told you that good food (fruits, veggies, nuts and a little lean protein-not processed meat) everyday for 10 days straight would make you feel better than you've ever felt in your life?  10 days of healthy eating-NO CRAP like processed food (if it comes in a box or a can...don't eat it), extra refined sugar, and NO FAST FOOD.  I guarantee in 10 days you'll feel better.  You'll have more energy, your skin will look better, you'll be in a better mood, and you know what else?  you'll lose weight.  

I highly recommend doing this for 10 days, but realistically it's tough to change like that, and after 10 days you'll be salivating for something terrible. So here is my challenge...for ten days drink 4 liters of water per day, if you already do that, then eat a piece of fruit everyday, if you already to do that, then cut red meat out.  you see where I am going?  Do something good for your HEALTH for 10 days straight. Then tell me how you feel.

If you really feel ambitious rent one of these movies: 
Food, Inc
Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead
Forks Over Knives
Food Matters

Who is going to take me up on my challenge?

Monday, February 13, 2012

One Thing.

If you could change one thing about they way you live to make it better, what would it be?

I would LOVE to have chickens.  For their eggs and their meat.  I currently live in a subdivision on a 1/2 acre lot.  We have a fairly nice sized back yard and could easily house chickens, but city ordinances prevent us from having them.  BOO!

Chicken is the hardest thing for me to buy and eat.  Truth be told, I haven't bought chicken in about 3 months.  I may have eaten it at a family dinner here or there, but I can't recall.  Chicken through the BIG 4 meat processors are raised in the most deplorable conditions.  Too fat to stand or walk more than a few seconds, breast so big, because we, Americans, love big breasts.

Without getting too political (my social and fiscal politics are on two opposite ends of the spectrum, I'm the most conservative liberal you'll ever meet), I just can't bear the thought of these chickens being treated and slaughtered in the mass manner they are, then feeding that to my family.  I guess my generation has been conditioned into believing that those beautiful farms in the commercials with big red barns, and rolling fields of grain are the actual places our meat is coming from, and we believe them.  Most of us never having to slaughter our own meat for survival, like our grandma's did.  But, alas, it's way easier this way, I suppose or much more of us would be vegetarian.

So if you could change ONE THING today to make your life better, what would it be?


Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Handling goals. How do you do it?

It's been a bit of a whirlwind for me lately, I am trying to get MLM (multi-level marketing) business going for my family.  My husband and I have a goal of moving our family out of Illinois and on a place with some acreage, so our kids can have farm animals, ride their ATVs and I can have a massive garden (ahhhhh just thinking about it makes me all cozy inside).

Unfortunately for me at 35 years old, I am just starting this process of really setting and working toward a goal.  I have had weight loss goal and running goals in the past, but 90% of the time I get bored/tired of it/discouraged and just give up.  Those goals have only affected me, personally, so really it wasn't that big of a deal.

Since jumping out of a perfectly good airplane last year, I have found this insatiable thirst for adrenaline and life.  It really changed me.  I've always been upbeat, glass half full motivational type of person which is good, except when following through with my goals.  You see.  I can easily let go of let downs, discouragement, and failure.  For a "driven" individual, these words/actions are detrimental.  For me to say I want to lose 10 lbs in 2 months and after 2 months I've only lost 5, I'm like 'eh...whatever.  Point is...this business of goal setting, following through and reaching just has never been a big priority for me.

That all changed this last two months.  I've been setting these small goals with my business, goals that are not only attainable, but don't require a huge time investment and reap amazing rewards, mentally.  Do you know what I am saying?   When I complete a goal I set I have this sense of accomplishment that no one can take away from me, and on the contrary-people are happy for me, and I am happy, too.

I was listening to a conference call last night.  The guest speaker was a married woman with three kids.  Her husband lost his job, twice and she was supporting their family by teaching classes, which wasn't enough to cover their cost of living.  They lost their cars, their home and went on welfare.  She had this epiphany at that moment that changed her life and she set this goal.  Long story short she reached her goal and it's changed her life completely.  Her name is Vanessa Coleman.  You can listen to her story here.  It's pretty inspiring if you need a lift.

I've been setting these small goals for myself and meeting them...it's an AMAZING feeling!

What do you do to meet your goals?  What kind of goals do you set for yourself?  How do you get over people bringing you down.  I need help myself, as I want to move my family to a farm SOON!


Friday, February 3, 2012

Feeling Fan-FREAKING-Tastic?

Yes??  Awesome!  why?  what is moving you?  what are you doing on a regular basis that gets you in the mood that makes anything possible?

No?  Why not?

My mission in life is to reach into every mother's head and make them love them self.  Take time for them. Here's the dealio, pals.  You have ONE life.  Just one. That means every day you spend angry, depressed, irritated, or any other negative adjective you can insert in the this sentence is a day lost.  A day you're NOT spending...no... enjoying this speck of time we call life.

The earth is billions of years old, time is not stopping for you or anyone.  Take a long hard look in the mirror.  If you don't like what you see today, then why do you keep living in the negative?

Do you have kids?  If yes...read on.

Your kids learn from you.  Is that a huge responsibility?  Of course it is!  Cause if you are Mr. and Mrs. everything is wrong, my life sucks, I hate everything, then guess what?  I can almost guarantee you'll be on a talk show in 15 years with some unqualified moron and your kids talking about how you ruined them.  Right now you are shaping your child(ren's) view of life, people, atmospheres, and love.

Now listen...I'm not sayin you have whistle dixie out your ass and be Fakey McFakerson, but take all the energy you are using to loathe daily life and turn it around.  Find the positive in a negative situation.  Every day is not going to be great.  Just this morning I found ANOTHER hair clippie that my 5 year old left on the floor-which is no big deal, except we have a dog that loves to use hair clippies as chew toys.  I've told my lovely daughter 7,582 times since Christmas morning to put her "damn clippies in the bathroom when you're done" cause the dog will chew them up.  It's frustrating.  But hey, it's just a clippie, and yeah...that's not the point, but sometimes you just gotta let it go.

Really our life and time on this earth is just a teeny tiny little speck of dust in the grand scheme of things.  I leave you with this:

So GET BUSY living or get busy dying...you're choice.


Thursday, February 2, 2012

Huge, Exciting News!

I signed up for the Chicago Marathon!  TWENTY SIX POINT TWO MILES!!  What?  you read me right!  This is not a running blog...but dang I am so excited I had to share.

Not only did I sign up but a shit ton of my friends are signed up and running too!!  And every time I imagine cross the finish line I start to tear up.  This is going to be AMAZING!!

I am so excited and honored to be running for the Ronald McDonald House Charities!

Looking forward to the months ahead!